Patrick McGinlay's Internet Tendency

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September 24, 2003

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The plot to Legally Blonde 2 does seem slightly out there. Elle Woods (Reese Witherspoon) goes to Washington to campaign for animal rights after discovering that her dog's mother is being used for cosmetic testing. There she encounters resistance to her plan from the stuffy establishment, so her building's doorman (Bob Newhart) quickly shows her the ways and workings of our nation's capital.

I really liked Legally Blonde so when I heard about this sequel I hoped it wouldn't be Legally Blonde in another location. Alas, what I feared has come true but this does not mean the film was bad only predictable. It does have some really funny parts and Bob Newhart is great as the ever helpful and knowledgeable door man. Jennifer Coolidge is really funny again as Elle's dopey hairdresser friend Paulette and Luke Wilson is under-utilised as Elle's fiancé, Emmett.

This film is aimed at the teenage market and like the first film it gives you the message of "don't give up despite the challenges put against you" and "be yourself and you'll be fine." Also, like the first film its humour is in the way Elle goes about getting what she wants done.


I've never been able to put James Bond films into a genre, they've always seem to me to be a so ludicrous that they need a genre of their own. So it came as no surprise to me that someone decided to make a James Bond for juniors spy franchise and that's what you should expect from Agent Cody Banks.

The plot seems so simple. To his family and friends, Cody Banks (Frankie Muniz) is a typical teen -- he loves to skateboard, hates math, and feels like a complete idiot around girls. But Cody's got a secret -- he's actually part of a secret teen CIA program. Cody's living every boy's dream life -- he can drive like a stuntman, has an incredible arsenal of cool gadgets, and his agency mentor, Ronica Miles (Angie Harmon) is totally hot. But Cody's training is put to the test when he's sent to pose as a prep school student and befriend fellow teen Natalie Connors (Hilary Duff) in order to gain access to her father -- a scientist unknowingly developing a fleet of deadly nanobots for the evil organization ERIS. Cody has to use everything he's learned to prove himself as an agent and stop ERIS from completing their mission -- and maybe even get the girl.

What I loved about this film is that it has all the James Bond elements. Keith David does an excellent job as the CIA director who just wants the mission to run successfully, I especially enjoy his "angry black lieutenant" moments. Darrell Hammond is great as the very odd CIA gadget maker, who much like Q, just wants his inventions to come back in one piece. Angie Harmon, who is wearing extremely tight clothing throughout this entire film -- this is probably done to entice older male siblings who have to take their younger brother or sister to this film to enjoy it -- is great as Cody's career driven handler.

Yes, those elements all make a great spy film but the best bit about any spy film is the villains. Brinkman (Ian McShane) is an excellent Bond villain -- he wants to destroy the US using nanobots, how Bond villain is that? Brinkman also has the funniest looking henchman I've ever seen, Molay (Arnold Vosloo) looks like he's been confronted with ever form of death possible and survived. They do indeed make the film worth watching.

This film is James Bond for juniors but hey its fun, enjoyable, has stupid stunts and explosions and hot chicks, what else could a 15 year old want.


I really enjoyed the first Tomb Raider film, it took an action packed video game and turned it into a half decent movie with plot and character development. Now in its sequel plot takes a back seat and we go straight into the action the game is best known for.

This time Lara Croft (Angelina Jolie) journeys to the sunken underwater temple of Alexander the Great. In the temple she finds a sphere, only to have it stolen from her by Chen Lo (Simon Yam), the leader of a Chinese crime syndicate, who we discover is in league with a villain named Reiss (Ciarán Hinds). Lara discovers that this sphere will lead you to the mythical Pandora's Box and Reiss wants to use the Box as a doomsday weapon. In order to get her hands back on the sphere, Lara enlists the help of Terry Sheridan (Gerard Butler), an ex-British agent and ex-lover of Croft's, who decides to help her in order to get out of a Kazakhstani prison.

Angelina Jolie is by far the reason this franchise works. She plays Croft as a strong and smart figure for women to look up to and the fact that she appears in swimsuits, extremely tight tank tops and pants means men will enjoy the eye candy Jolie is, but all things being fair, Gerard Butler gets his shirt off at least four times for the ladies.

I do wish that in the next one we see more of Noah Taylor who plays Crofts nerdy computer hacking solving problems guy and Chris Barrie who plays Croft's butler/researcher. They are really funny and provide some necessary comedy relief in a film like this. Next time let them come along, Lara.

Anyway this film comes down to this, explosions, tight clothing, stupid fight scenes, shark punching. What else do you want from an action film based on a video game?



Initially, Tomb Raider 2 is an entertaining movie, escapism at its finest, no it is not the action movie of the year, but it's good for a laugh. Yes the plot is lacking, but what it lacks is made up for with boobs, hair, lips, costumes and product placement.

I swear Jolie has so much lip she doesn't know what to do with them, she almost looks uncomfortable. They tend to get in the way of the plot as well, they are very distracting, and almost hypnotic... more so then even the perky nipples!

Hair is clearly a priority for Lara, its always so neat and clean looking, even when it is getting burnt of by Pandora's acid tears... I wonder what shampoo she uses? Also Lara changes costumes at every opportunity, so be prepare for a bit of a fashion festival.

Product placement runs rampant in Tomb Raider, I don't like blatant product placement, and it really detracts from the narrative... righhhhhhhhhhhhhhhttttttt!

SHE PUNCHES A SHARK!!!! That was pretty funny…though I have it on good authority that, that is exactly what you're supposed to do if a shark is charging…it was convenient the shark was able to give her lift to the surface rather than take her deeper down. Yes sir the coincidences never end if you're Lara Croft!

The film tries to set Lara up a complex individual, double crossed by the love of her life, torn between saving the world and getting his love back… yup… it is like TOTALLY believable. Maybe it was the lips that made him turn… they could drive anyone crazy! Or maybe it was the obsession with her hair… Or maybe it was the constant need to change her clothes… or maybe it was the fact that she likes to bash guys up, who knows… I think there was something about him wanting money for something and that being more important than her love. Whatever it was they make it quite clear that he has to go!

The romantic interest is about a 7.5 on the salty goodness meter, and yes he likes to take his top off a lot... but don't they all! I didn't find him very romantic at all, the Irish accent was a bit nice but I'd rather go for Hillary, now there's a real man!

In my opinion the real stars were her faithful side-kicks Bryce and Hillary they didn't get enough screen time, they deserve their own spin off... it could be called "Bryce and Hillary". I think it works... there could be sequels and in one Lara could turn bad and they have to take her on, WHAM BAM! Hillary has some moves on him as you'll see!

Lots and lots of men get bashed up and killed... I'd read deeper into that but I don't think there is anything to read... probably just being PC...

Prediction... Lara's next arch nemesis is going to be a woman... Think about it.

Good idea, fun, easy on the eyes, all in all relatively good.


LEGALLY BLONDE 2 stars Reese Witherspoon and a little dog in a pink jumper. It's rated PG and runs 95 minutes. It opened last week.

AGENT CODY BANKS stars the kid from Malcolm In The Middle. It's rated PG and runs 95 minutes. It opens tomorrow.

LARA CROFT TOMB RAIDER THE SUBTITLE OF LIFE stars Angelina Jolie and Rimmer from Red Dwarf. It's rated M and runs 117 minutes. It opens tomorrow.


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